Feeling grateful everyday

It is true you know, once your eyes are opened to another level and world there is no going back. Sometimes it's kind of difficult knowing but mostly it's amazing. I often wonder whether I would go back to where I was still closed off to the magic. But life now is wonderful and beauty is everywhere through time and space and on all levels and realms.

 Sometimes you just have to take a minute and really appreciate what you have got and feel grateful for this moment right now. Sometimes life happens and we get tired, sad, feel inadequate or even poor, but really when you think about it you are living someone else's dream life. You are rich in so many ways already, whether its the friends you have, the love from a partner, children, a home, a bed to sleep in, inner peace, a garden, pets etc there are other people who wish they had these things, be grateful today and everyday for you and your wonderful life. I know I am, I am so grateful for the water that comes out the taps, for heat at the flick of a switch, for my health, for my legs and feet that take me where I want to go, for my eyes so I can see the beauty in the world, for my ears to listen to music, my hands to create art, space to grow plants, chickens for fresh eggs, the love I have for myself, space to create, a comfy bed to sleep in, the list is endless.

 How blessed am I!

Really excited that this art I finished last week had loads of love from friends, so I have had it made into prints which are available for £15 on my Etsy store or through Facebook 

 

Hope you are having a wonderful week, I am really excited to be going to Conscious camp this weekend, it was such a suprise because I wanted to go for ages but don't drive and it's in Wales (I am in Blackpool), so when my feind texted me yesterday to see if I wanted a lift i was overjoyed. I am going to take my camera and will upload some photos when I get back. 

Love Dotty xx

#artvartist Dotty Delightful

For ‪#‎artvsartist 

It's supposed to show how your appearance compares to the people you paint but I paint various things! 

Have you joined in on the trend? its so cool to see all the different art in one place.

Love Dotty xx

Ways to embrace your feelings

This is what turning 40 looks like, 

tired but so happy to know I have grown and changed so much over the past decade, I embrace everyday knowing that as each night turns to daylight my soul will be inspired, my heart will be filled with joy, my eyes will see the beauty around me and my ears will be filled with laughter. 

To keep the balance, some days will be filled with tears, with an empty longing for adventure and closeness to my grown up children, to realise and feel my heart brake a little at the pain in the works and the needless suffering or when hormones kick in and I feel fat, unhappy and dowdy, I wish for a time machine so I can go back and hug my mum for one last time and tell her of all the wonderful things I have experienced, but I know can process those feelings, thoughts and emotions on a scale where I don't have to turn to drink or drugs etc to block out the pain or feelings. 

I feel like sharing some advice, it's ok to be sad, it's ok to feel, it's ok to cry, it's ok to be happy, it's ok to love yourself, you have permission to release the free spirit that's trapped inside you and step up to who you truly are. Switch off the news, switch off the soap operas, stop reading the papers and 'women's magazines, these vibrate at a lower frequency and fill your head with things that are fear based and not real. Go to the library or book store and go the the self help or new age section and choose a book that resonates with you, pick it and rad, your mind will be opened to something new, something better. Watch the celestine prophecy, listen to meditations by Louise Hay or Marc Allen on YouTube, get into nature everyday if possible, smile, and remember if you think nobody loves you, I love you!

 I believe in you
Love Dotty xx

how to get rid of guilt

Friendship, love ones, people we meet, how amazing that they are all so wonderful and touch our hearts, make us smile and help us to make long lasting memories.

 I finished this canvas on my birthday as I felt so grateful.

Each morning I wake up with a grateful heart and try to put a positive spin on my lack of sleep (dogs, chickens, neighbours, seagulls) I tell myself the day will be wonderful and I feel how great it's going to be and most of the time it is, then sometimes something crashes into your life like a giant destructive wave and shatters and tests your resolve, yesterday it was my youngest son, he is 17 and is convinced he has problems with his brain, he isolates himself and gets fearful going out, he said I was driving him away and broke down. We had hours of talking and crying trying to figure out a way forward and trying to understand each other. 

I think because the boys are quiet and keep themselves to themselves a lot of the time, I presume they are fine, as a parent, I have come to the conclusion that no matter how hard you try and be a 'good' parent, or what you think you are doing is OK, it sometimes isn't, we are blinded by ourselves and versions of our lives in our heads because we are living it. 

I also find that the change in me has affected him, he said he liked the fun version of me years ago (when I drank and took drugs)  and when he was younger, I tried to explain how I have changed for the better and this new me is more conscious and aware of the actions of imbibing substances to escape the dreary existence that is life (when you are in a bad place, domestic violence, broke, single parent etc). Now I have a good life I don't feel the need to escape in that way. 

Being a teenager is really hard anyway, trying to fathom out what is going on with your body and head and having a new age mother spouting 'fairy words' as he calls it, is hard too, but I never realised this before.

 I have spoken to quite a few mums lately and we all agreed that out children have turned out opposite to us,  they all think we are a bit sad (uncool) and no matter how we try to do our best with the info we have at any given time, its not always good enough in their eyes. 

This used to make me feel bad and very guilty but now I listen, I try and process it and hopefully do a better job tomorrow because we are all just trying our best and thats all you can do. After he went back upstairs with a hug I put on some uplifting music and mopped the kitchen floor to get my mind away from dwelling on it all.

Love Dotty xx

My indian inspired 40th birthday party

It was my 40th Birthday on May 5th and to celebrate I had an Indian inspired party, the first party in our new home. The guests brought Indian themed, dairy free and meat free food to share, I asked if they had any instruments to bring those too so we could have a big jamming session. I didn't expect any gifts but if they had something lovely to share with myself and others like indian head massages, a poem, a meditation, a mantra, a dance etc that would be just lovely. But I ended up with some amazing presents, really felt spoilt. We had a cacao ceremony, lots of hugs, fun and singing.

My friend who shares the same birthday as me did some henna on my hands, I love it and want to keep it forever!

My Indian inspired shrine, complete with some of my favourite things and a painting I made of Lakshmi, who is the Hindu goddess of wealth, fortune, and prosperity (both material and spiritual)

We made tissue paper pom poms, you take 6 pieces of tissue paper and fold them in a fan, long ways, then secure them in the middle with string or wool, fold in half and then tease the sheets out on either side, there are plenty of tutorials on the web for them.

 I made an arch out of cardboard, its orange and hot pink and has stick on gems and my drawings on it and I got these lantern lights from the £1 shop.

I loved that guests made the effort to buy outfits for my party and they all looked so beautiful, I felt like an exotic princess! You can view the full set of birthday photos on my facebook page.

Love Dotty xx

 

Beneath every strong, independent woman ...truth

 

This... this is so true, 

just because I now choose to be positive and happy doesn't mean I have always been this way, 

I have learned, I have grown, awful things have happened in my life, I have suffered tragedy, had severe depression, had an eating disorder, been abused through domestic violence, felt abandoned when my dad left when I was 7, am now an adult orphan with no parents, been a single mum to 3 boys for 8 years, 

things I do not wish to disclose to anyone but you know what, I don't feel bad, 

I don't want revenge, I am not a victim, I am not 'in recovery', I am recovered and everything that has happened to me, has made me the person I am today and for that I am thankful, 

 everything that has happened, happened for a reason, it made me strong, it made me realise that I can choose to dwell on the past and feel like a dark cloud is over me or I can choose to be thankful, 

I choose to see the good, I choose to feel positive and shine my light. Everyone has a past, everyone has a story, no one knows what that is unless they are told. 

Don't automatically judge a person on how they are now, it's often taken a long and winding road to get to where they are today.

 Love Dotty xx

A day in the life as an entrepreneur

 

 

 

A million thoughts go through your head, new ideas pop up all the time, you try, you fail, you try, you succeed, life isn't always smooth but thats OK because it's those times which make you grow, it's those times which show you your strength.

 You wonder wouldn't be easier to give it all up?, to forget your dream, to be a 9 to 5er and then, magic happens, you make a sale, you become inspired by anothers encouraging words, your spark is rekindled and you think YES!! 

I can do this, I will make it, I will achieve my dreams, its been a long and sometimes bumpy road but I am on this journey and enjoying the ride. 

You can't compare yourself to someone elses journey, we each live our own, you can't ever truly know what someones life is like because you don't live in their body, we are all just trying to make it the best we can. 

Support and encouragement, kindness and hope, thats what we all need, forgot the drama, see the good, shine your light, and if you have no light then sort that shit out! Work on yourself, you and only you have the power to control how you feel.

 Love Dotty xx

Hema stationary review

It's national stationary week and those lovely folks over at HEMA have sent me some goodies to try, very excited hands up who loves stationary?

Where do you get your stationary from?

Love Dotty xx

Colouring canvases and lack of sleep

Check out my latest idea -

Relieve stress while creating art for your walls with a Coloring Canvas, use felt tip pens to colour in and enhance this amazing illustration hand drawn by me, each one unique, I take commissions or you can find these on Etsy

I have also thought it would be a good idea to paint and decorate paper fans but after the paint dried it wouldn't close properly and was a real pain and a faff, so I won't be bothering with that again.

 We have decided to give the dogs their own bedroom, we are so tired everyday from them sleeping in our bedroom, its really annoying how they wake us up loads of times in the night, so we have been taking it in turns to co-sleep with them in their bedroom until they get used to being in there. Every other night I get a decent nights sleep, its like having babies, it's crazy!

I am working on my 40th Birthday party too now, its going to be Indian themed and today I am threading hot pink flowers onto invisible thread to make garlands. I am realy excited for it and going to attempt to make Mojito mocktails and we are sharing Indian food and hopefuly having a cacao ceremony too.

Love Dotty xx